All shrek taught me was that if you want someone more attractive than you you have to wait till they’re ugly then swoop in
My friend always thinks it’s hilarious to dislocate his shoulder when he’s drunk. The look on this girl’s face says otherwise.
mom: you ok? what’s on your mind?
easter is on 4/20 next year
blaze it and praise it
and on the third day Jesus rose high as a muthafucka
i mean i would eat healthy food but do you remember that one time that adam and eve ate an apple in the garden of eden and doomed all of humanity so idk better not risk it
i came into this world covered in someone else’s blood and screaming and lemme tell you i’m not afraid to leave it the same way